The most natural expression of life coaching (coaching applied to life) is relationship coaching (coaching applied to the relationship), because the entire human existence is a question of relationship with other individuals. The more balanced, harmonious and rewarding relationships are, the greater the personal well-being will be.
Creating and maintaining a healthy and balanced relationship is not an innate ability, but a knowledge that we acquire from our parents and the adults who take care of us, who become our reference models. Models that can be healthy and unhealthy, with an infinite variety of intermediate shades.
Interpersonal relationships, especially sentimental and intimate relationships, require the ability to be open, honest and to show our vulnerability, a capacity that we rarely had the chance to acquire safely.
The demanding relationships that we experience during our life generally produce pain and consequently our natural attitude to protect ourselves accumulates defensive layers, to create a safe place in which to take refuge, a fortress in which the pain caused by another human being cannot penetrate. In this shell, however, not even the joy and warmth of a healthy relationship are able to enter.
Without even realizing it, we can spend our entire life closed in this defense, without ever learning how to change, when possible, or how to close, when change is not possible, the relationship that makes us suffer. Without ever discovering how a balanced and harmonious relationship can be rewarding.
Our barriers could be in fact responsible for the ongoing sabotage and failure of a relationship with all the characteristics to be healthy and effective. The good news is that the reference models can be changed and the ability to relate in a balanced and harmonious way can be learned, as any other competence in life.
This is exactly the field of relationship coaching: supporting clients in the discovery and fine-tuning of this specific competence in order to create balanced and satisfying relationships.